Twilight the Movie

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNjM1NjcxNzY=.html

What is that, you may ask? Well, that is a bootlegged copy of Twilight from Japan. It's glitchy and needs to be started and paused sporadically, but it's worth it for those of you who haven't seen the movie (losers) or want to see it again (everyone).
It's free, online, and doesn't require downloading Zango, which sucks...
So watch it and enjoy our review.

While it lacks many events from the book, we accept this, because they didn't change the essence of the book, unlike other book-to-movies.
The makers couldn't put all trillion pages of wonderful in the movie.
Kate: actually it's 498.
Caroline:How do you know that?
Robert Pattinson is a good actor, despite crushing teen expectations of perfect everywhere.
Still, he's good at playing creepy.
Kristen Stewart is also really good, because she's not overly Hollywood-ized like many other young actresses and isn't made up to be perfect, although she's really pretty.
The makeup in the movie is a little weird and makes everyone uglier than they are normally.
The scenes sometimes are really freaky. And Edward running up the mountain is really fake.
But how are you supposed to do that?
The plot is pretty much exactly the same as the book, only everything seems really sped up and rushed.
Also, the action doesn't really begin until the last half-hour or so...
We all realize how much the movie was cheesy and overally bad, but our conclusion is that we love it!
It's sorta impossible not to. Like a vicious puppy. You shouldn't love it, but you can't help it, it's too cute. It was worth fourteen bucks and watching it over and over again illegally.
I have the bootleg favorited...
Anyway, post your reviews below...

Vampires

DISCLAIMER: THIS POST HAS BEEN EDITED FOR PROFANITY, CONTENT, AND SEXUAL INNUEDO. NOT THAT THE AFOREMENTIONED DO NOT EXIST IN THIS CONVERSATION.

YO--
Kate: You can't start every post with yo. Be like WAZZUP HOMIE G.
Caroline: You are not ghetto.
K: Go, little iHome remote. Go to the next song! YES!
C: I win.
YO
Vampires are pretty much the basis of the book. If everyone was a freaking human, we wouldn't have a story.
First some facts (we will debunk popular vampire myths in a later post)
1) They're sparkly in the sun.
2) They're hot.
3) They VANT TO SUUCK YOUR BLOOOOOD! (They all do. We'll discuss the Cullens later, but do not be fooled, they all vant to suuck your blooooood. )
4)They're immortal....duh
5) They're fast...and strong...
C: GODDARNED LAPTOP MOUSE!!
K: Are you surprised you can't use your mouse on your boobs? Maybe try a flat surface?
C: Like yours????
ANYWAY... and their skin is ice cold. SAY IT BELLA!!!
K: Vampire!
C: You're not Bella.
8)They have acute senses.
9) Don't like themselves some werewolves...
10) They don't sleep. Instead they stalk innocent teenage girls....wait, that's just Edward...nevermind
11)They have one rule: don't do anything to expose vampires.
12) The Volturi (discussed at length later) Aro, Marcus, and Caius, really, really old vampires enforce this rule.
13) Some of them have special powers...Edward reads minds, Alice can kinda-sorta read the future, Jane creates mental agony, etc.
Physical Stuffs
14) really attractive...
15) Giant bags under their eyes (they never sleep, what do you expect?) Meyer refers to them as 'purplish bruises underneath their eyes,' but vampires don't bruise.
16) Eye color- Black when they haven't fed in a bit, bright crimson when newborns, red when they've recently drunk human blood, amber for vegetarians.


More later, we gots to go...
School sux.
PEACE OUT.

Edward

DISCLAIMER: THIS POST HAS BEEN EDITED FOR PROFANITY, CONTENT, AND SEXUAL INNUENDO...





Yo.


Before we start, I would like to announce that Taylor Lautner is going to be Jacob in New Moon. Which is good, 'cause he's hot.





Back to Edward, who we figured would be a good starting point, as he is the main character.


Kate: **whisper** and the sexiest character.


yeah...


As all of us know, even Caroline (who, for the record, is on Team Jacob), Edward is darnded sexy.


Physical description should not be necessary, as Stephenie Meyer (author, le duh) explains how effing sexy he is every other word. However, it shall be provided.


Kate: Pale, sparkly, et cetera.


Okay, that's pretty much it...amber eyes, super strong, typical vampire stuff.
Bella describes him as Adonis, a pretty much perfect greek god.
He's tall (6'2") with bronze hair. His eyes used to be green, and this trait later carries on to his daughter, Renesmee....
Stupid name...

Edward is described as being more of a fast, 'mountain lion' type, as oppsed to, for instance, Emmett's brute force, bear-like.

K: I like Emmett. I like how they describe his laugh as a guffaw.

K: Why are we laughing?

C: Cuz you're stupid.

Edward is particularly attracted to Bella, once described as his 'singer' because her blood sings to him.

And he's in love with her...for this reason?

Yeah...

Edward can also read minds, or what people are thinking.

However, Bella is a mental mute to him. He can't hear anything she thinks.

Edward likes classical music, probably because he was 'born' in 1918.
He can also play the piano really well, and writes Bella a lullaby.

He was turned into a vampire at the age of 17 during the influenza epidemic.
He was also the first vampire created by Carslisle, to be Carslisle's 'companion.'
Carslisle was a doctor, and Elizabeth Masen, Edward's birth mother, begged him to save Edward right before she died.
It is suggested she sorta-kinda got that Carlie was a little bit not human.
So, yeah, that covers it...
Did we mention he's sexy?

Hola, Twilight peoples!

Kate: Don't put twilighters, 'cuz I'll shoot the next person that says that.
Caroline: I wasn't going to...
K: And not a lot of people speak Spanish.
C: Everyone knows what 'hola' means.
K: Caroline, I'm falling...**falls off bed** ow. That hurt my butt!
C: Shut up, dipstick.
K: **laughs crazy-like**
C: It wasn't funny... Can we get to the twilight stuff?
K: Hello Kitty throw!!!
C: Mine. Now let's start off...
If you've come across this, you've...
K: I need to get my Hello Kitty throw.
C: Shut up!
As I was saying, you probably like Twilight. If you don't, then you've heard of it. Everyone has, really. Even African orphans whose parents were stricken with AIDS.
K: That's kinda mean.
C: A little bit.
Okay, probably not them...
K: But everyone else.
C: That's what I was going to say.
K: Yo mama!
C: STFU!
Basically we created this site as a fansite and reference guide for anyone interested in Twilight.
We wanted to make this because we read this stupid Twilight guide that said werewolves routinely eat humans and are furry 24/sev. And we all know Jacob is not like that... He's a sexy beast, and not in the beastly way...
K: No he's not! Caroline is typing. Edward pwns!
(no, that is not a typo. Edward owns with a capital P.)
C: Freak.
Anyway, the shiz about everyone was totally off.
K: Shiz? I think you should put jazz.
The JAZZ was screw-up.
K: AND LIES!!!
C: **aside**you're really angry about this...
K: Yeah.
We don't think the author read the book. I suggest you buy it to laugh at its stupidity. It gave me a laugh.
So we're gonna post some JAZZ about a bunch a SHIZ. Like how Jacob is better than Edward...
K: No, that's not true. Not true! Lies!
Well, we're gonna post character overviews, arguments on the aforementioned and all that good stuff.


There is no room for haters when there is so much love.


Love
K-That is bull.
Caroline&Kate